A page from Sita’s Diary

Last night, the clouds greyed, swelled, and poured. Heavily. With that, whatever I was holding back within my secretive home- my heart -came crashing down. Hitting the surface with the memories of the past: the childhood, the love, and the chase.

Separation has never caused me much grief. I have from a very young age learnt the art of living without luxuries such as jewellery, palaces, and fame. But what grieves me immensely is my own imagination- His desolate eyes, void expressions, sunken shoulders, and volatile heart- Rama’s Broken face.

If the rain would’ve fallen on our little Kutiya as well, Rama must’ve had soaked in it all night long. He would tell Laxman he had a duty to protect me. But what he would never mention out loud is his love for me, which forced him to let go of his duty and chase the golden deer in the first place.

Strangely, the lush green beauty of Lanka reminds me of my native land, Mithila! I still remember how my dad would throw his arms out wide, laughing, when I ran to him to embrace him.

My mother on the other hand was never too expressive of her emotions. She would watch us father and daughter duo from a distance; always having my back but never telling me so.

“She is a witch” I once heard a maid call me by that name. My mother assuaged me at night, explaining my relationship with the divine as “Healing”.

I remember even Rama telling me that I am a healer. My presence is enough to cure him of all his woes, he would say and smile.

With Sita gone, who will take away his pains!

On my Swayamvar, came kings from around the world. Rama was just a little boy! But, he managed to achieve what even the most celebrated.. the so-called learned and powerful men couldn’t. This thought fills me with hope.

A hope to go back to my home. Someday. Perhaps. Not where there is glory, jewels, and a kingdom waiting to crown us. But to our humble abode, in the jungle. To sit in the rain next to Rama. To talk with him about the beautiful bygone days.

After all, when he shall be the king, he would have to place duty above love. And sadly, no woman likes to share her place!